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Buying Our Way Out of Purgatory One Catholic Priest at a Time
Same Old Gag
by: Doug Stanhope
Posted: 05/03/02         Score: 3.2         Votes: 103
Here's a sad, half-hearted comeback attempt. My imagination left with the beer.
guysunday: hi
Doug Stanhope: Go blow a monkey.
guysunday: ??
Doug Stanhope: Read it again.
Doug Stanhope: You show up, fuck me in the ass and leave before I come - then I don't hear from you for two and a half weeks while your Mother is calling every ten minutes asking where you are and now you just IM me like nothing is wrong.
Doug Stanhope: I couldn't shit for almost two days, david.
Doug Stanhope: And you wouldn't even stop when I was crying.
guysunday: read what? i closed the window
guysunday: why so hostile?
guysunday: i have no idea what you are talking about
guysunday: i'm not david
Doug Stanhope: Oh, fuck.
guysunday: you thought i was?
Doug Stanhope: Oh, shit I read the sn wrong.
guysunday: ohhh OK
Doug Stanhope: Now I feel like an asshole.
guysunday: it's ok
Doug Stanhope: OmyGod I am sooo embarassed.
guysunday: i was just taken aback by what you said
Doug Stanhope: Well he was an asshole.
guysunday: but no worries
guysunday: ok?
guysunday: it sounds like he was
Doug Stanhope: OK. What's your name?
guysunday: who was he?
guysunday: jay
guysunday: yours?
Doug Stanhope: I go by Bethany anymore. Ever since I met that guy online I don't give out my real name.
guysunday: okay bethany
guysunday: it says kelli ann in your info
guysunday: (i just checked0
Doug Stanhope: Oh shoot I forgot to change that too.
Doug Stanhope: So now you know.
guysunday: so you ARE kelli ann>
guysunday: ahhh OK
guysunday: so what happened with this david guy?
Doug Stanhope: I met him in a chat room.
guysunday: ok...
Doug Stanhope: He told me he was 30 but when he came over he looked about 50.
guysunday: and then met him in real life, too?
guysunday: ah ok
guysunday: yikes
guysunday: i really am 27
guysunday: just to let you know
Doug Stanhope: He seemed real nice but as soon as he got here he started going thru my Mm's medicine bottles and taking all her pills and got real crazy.
guysunday: and then it sounds like he was awful
guysunday: that' messed up
Doug Stanhope: I shoud have just cybered with him and saved my self a lot of heartache and two embarrassing stitches.
guysunday: how long ago was this?
Doug Stanhope: 3 weeks almost.
guysunday: oh my god... are you okjay?
Doug Stanhope: Ya, just hurt is all. And a bit plugged up.
Doug Stanhope: How are you?
guysunday: oh baby
guysunday: i'm sorry to hear all this
guysunday: i am ok
guysunday: overworked
guysunday: but ok
Doug Stanhope: What do you do?
guysunday: i'm in school
guysunday: as a grad student
guysunday: what state are you in?
Doug Stanhope: Wyoming now. Just moved. Rawlins.
guysunday: i'm in Wisconsin
guysunday: that guy david is also in wyoming>
guysunday: ?
guysunday: sorry t keep talking about that if you'd rather not
guysunday: we can talk about whatever
Doug Stanhope: Hold on, I'm on the phone cutey.
guysunday: oh ok
guysunday: sure
guysunday: i'll be here - just lemme know .
Doug Stanhope: Fuck, that was David's mother again. He called her from here after the shaved off my hair and she got the number off caller ID. She calls all the time asking if I've heard from him.
Doug Stanhope: Said he has to take his AZT or he'll die.
guysunday: what? really???
Doug Stanhope: I don't even know what it is and I don't wanna know.
Doug Stanhope: Prolly heart medication.
Doug Stanhope: But she sounds loopy.
guysunday: sweetie
guysunday: AZT is medication for HIV
guysunday: he shaved off your hair??
guysunday: are you sure she said AZT?
Doug Stanhope: Ya, she says it like I'm some doctor and should know what it is.
guysunday: sweetie, if it's AZT, you should get your blood tested
Doug Stanhope: Medication for what?
guysunday: HIV/AIDS
guysunday: HIV is the virus that causes AIDS
guysunday: you can look it up online
Doug Stanhope: No kidding???
guysunday: no kidding
guysunday: not at all
Doug Stanhope: Oh my heck!
guysunday: AZT was one of the first medications developed to treat AIDS
Doug Stanhope: I been having a lot of greenish discharge in my behind but I thought that was from the stitches and dish soap he put up there.
guysunday: i don't know what the greenish discharge would be from
guysunday: might not be related
Doug Stanhope: He did the stitches himself so I thought maybe it wasn't sterilized.
guysunday: but you really really should go to a doctor
Doug Stanhope: I think he felt bad after he came. A lot of guys do.
guysunday: he did the stitches himself?
guysunday: are you serious?
Doug Stanhope: Ya. It took him a while but I was so woozy from the Nyquil.
Doug Stanhope: He was really an asshole.
guysunday: nyquil?
Doug Stanhope: I guess I'm being a bummer.
guysunday: and you let him stitch you?
Doug Stanhope: Ya, he told me if I drank a whole bottle at once it would increase my bust size.
guysunday: that would be a big lie
Doug Stanhope: He stitched me afterwards cuz I guess I tore a bit.
guysunday: stiched you with what?
Doug Stanhope: My mom's sewing stuff. She keeps it in the brass bucket by the Lazy Boy
guysunday: sweetie
guysunday: promise me you'll go to the doctor about all of this
guysunday: or tell me you've made it all up and it's a joke?
Doug Stanhope: Nah, I don't feel sick. Just a little weepy in the hindquarters.
Doug Stanhope: A joke?
guysunday: if it's a joke, i won't worry
Doug Stanhope: If this is your idea of funny, you're a sicko.
guysunday: i'm not kidding at all
Doug Stanhope: You're no different from him.
Doug Stanhope: Laugh at me all you want.
guysunday: if he has AIDS, you need to go get checked
Doug Stanhope: Say this is funny, jerko.
guysunday: that's what i'm worried about
guysunday: it's not funny
Doug Stanhope: Then why did you say that?
guysunday: because it's not a good situation
Doug Stanhope: OK, but don't make fun of me.
guysunday: i'm not
guysunday: i promise i won't, and i promise i wasn't
Doug Stanhope: I just wanted to cyber anyhow. I didn't expect to be talking about this to anyone ever.
guysunday: i can understand
Doug Stanhope: I better go. I feel ashamed.
guysunday: dont' be ashamed
guysunday: i just want you to go get tested
guysunday: just for YOUR own sake and health
guysunday: and no worries, i got online to cyber, too
guysunday:
Doug Stanhope: How would you feel if a 55 year old man came into your house, filled you full of cough syrup, shaved your head and painted with shoe polish and than made you sing Lil Black Sambo while he fucked your ass with a 10 inch crook-dick covered in spots and nodules?
Doug Stanhope: Not real pretty I bet.
guysunday: no...
Doug Stanhope: But if you wanna cyber, I'd assume drop the whole subject.
guysunday: how old are you?
guysunday: for real?.
Doug Stanhope: 13. But I look like I'm 15 at least.
Doug Stanhope: What do you look like?
guysunday: i'm 6'3 brown hair blue eyes
guysunday: slim build
guysunday: you?
guysunday: do you have a pic?
Doug Stanhope: I'm slim too but I'm only 4'8" with no hair and a head stained Mahogany brown. I have kinda small tits.
Doug Stanhope: But my friend Randy said I have a good butt.
guysunday: that's cute
guysunday: i believe him
Doug Stanhope:
guysunday: i like thar
guysunday: that*
guysunday: why did you let the david dude shave your head and paint it?
Doug Stanhope: What else do you like and please don't say burning girls with a lighter.
Doug Stanhope: Oh
guysunday: yikes
guysunday: no way
Doug Stanhope: I was tied up. It wasn't my idea.
guysunday: i like having really good sweet gentle sex, with a bit of touch of the wild
guysunday: but nothign crazy
guysunday: oh ok
Doug Stanhope: I thought we weren't gonna talk about him any more.
Doug Stanhope: Let's talk about what you and me would do.
Doug Stanhope: Tell me how you'd treat me.
guysunday: babe, that whole experience sounds horrifying
guysunday: i'd treat you well
guysunday: i'd make you cum
guysunday: are you going to be online for a while? --- i have to call my friend about meeting tomoorww
Doug Stanhope: I never have.
guysunday: you never have, sweetie?
Doug Stanhope: Not really. I gotta go feed Clem.
guysunday: ohhhhhhhh i'd LOVE to make you cum, then
Doug Stanhope: Never came once.
guysunday: put me onyour buddy list if you would like
guysunday: ?
Doug Stanhope: Clem took out my clitoris when I was 19.
Doug Stanhope: 10*
guysunday: took out?
Doug Stanhope: It's a family thing.
Doug Stanhope: I really need a hug.
Doug Stanhope: And a wig.
guysunday: who is Clem?
guysunday: K
Doug Stanhope: Vernon's friend with the kook-eye.
guysunday: *HUG*
guysunday: i have to go for now, but maybe i will catch you later
Doug Stanhope: My timing is off but I haven't done this in a while.
guysunday: take care....
Doug Stanhope: wait
guysunday: ok...
Doug Stanhope: I didn't get to fuck you in the ass yet.
Doug Stanhope: It's kind of standard.
guysunday: k
guysunday: lol
Doug Stanhope: Take off your pants.
guysunday: k
Doug Stanhope: Spread your cheeks in a bored, this-old-gag-again, sleepy way.
guysunday: k.............
Doug Stanhope: Now reach between your legs and take hold of my aging gray sack and fondle it until I am hard.
Doug Stanhope: Beg for my ejaculate to fall into you.
guysunday: huh?
Doug Stanhope: Beg.
guysunday: aging and gray?
Doug Stanhope: It's the only way I'll be able to blow a load in you at my age.
Doug Stanhope: I can barely get fully hard anymore.
guysunday: dude, you're fucked up
Doug Stanhope: Is it normal to have one of my nuts this much lower than the other?
Doug Stanhope: Hang on, I'll get my wig and you lube up your shitter. This could take a while.
Doug Stanhope: Ok, I have on my crotchless Elvis pant suit and my cock is erect as it can get.

Previous message was not received by guysunday because of error: User guysunday is not available.


Doug Stanhope: Ok, I have on my crotchless Elvis pant suit and my cock is erect as it can get.

Previous message was not received by guysunday because of error: User guysunday is not available.

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